All I Wanna Do (Hell's Phoenix MC Series Book 1) Read online

  I grab a piece of toilet paper and wipe my mouth and then stand. Even more nausea, I stumble out of the bathroom stall. I look at my pale complexion in the mirror. My hair is frazzled. Bags under my eyes. I am so damn tired. I look like death. I reach for the faucet to turn it on. Cupping the cold water, I splash it on my face hoping to do something to take me out of my funk. It doesn’t work. I turn the water off and grab a paper towel.

  I need to get my ass home. Confliction is consuming me. I hate to leave my coworkers high and dry. But I can’t handle this.

  ***

  On the way home, my gut starts to turn once more. Why the hell am I feeling like this? Influenza? Not really. I pull my car into the local drug store. I need to get something, but I have no clue what. Tums? Maybe.

  As I walk down the aisles, I stroll by the pregnancy test. Then it hits me. Could I be? No. I can’t be! But, just maybe. I have to rule that out. I grab a box of three tests. I know these things say they are 99% effective, but you just never know. I have to be sure I am not.

  ***

  I puke once more while I wait for the lovely two minutes to pass by for the first test. This is horrible. I have never in my life felt this crappy. I am a healthy individual. Exercise, eat well, and do not harm my body with toxins. I wipe my mouth once more. The alarm on my phone goes off. The results should be in.

  I take a deep breath before looking at the little stick that potentially holds my faith. Another deep breath. My eyes open to look at two little pinks lines indicating I have a bun in the oven.

  Freaking the fuck out, I drop my pants and grab another stick to test. I should have peed on all the sticks the first time. But I was sure I was not going to be pregnant. Now, I have to wait another two minutes. I plop my ass on the toilet and try to squeeze out more pee. This time, I pee on the last two sticks.

  After ensuring I got enough on both sticks, I set them both on the counter. I wash my hands and set my alarm for another two minutes. Ugh, the wait is going to kill me. I pace back and forth, back and forth. Still fighting off the nausea feeling, the first test popping up positive does not help the icky feeling in my stomach.

  Beep. Beep. Beep.

  The alarm on my phone goes off once again. Another deep breath. I look down at the counter.

  It is true. I cannot believe it. Both tests are positive. It just cannot be. I am fucking pregnant. The tears start to stream down my cheeks. The last man I had sex with was…James, the biker who I left after one night.

  How will I find him?

  The one night I decide to let loose and be irresponsible, I get fucking pregnant.

  I do not know what to do.

  My life has now changed.

  Chapter 1

  Present Day

  James

  It is just another fucking day at the morgue. Consultations with grief stricken family members trying to plan their loved one’s funeral. It isn’t an easy job by any means, but I enjoy it. The reaction when people see that I am the person who is taking care of their deceased family member is one in million. You would think an attractive looking man greeting them with a smile wouldn’t intimidate them. Well, they see my neck covered in tattoos and it takes them a little bit to open up, but once they do, they realize I’m an all right guy who served this great country.

  A couple of my army friends and I opened this morgue a year ago when we got out of the service. We all had the training in the military and felt we could run our own business. Nothing like diving in head first, but we are managing. Our focus is serving those who served our country. Being military, we understand. It is a code between us brothers and sisters. Unfortunately, too many have been dying lately, making for long, hard days.

  After one of the viewings tonight, I will be heading to Dirty Jays to meet my buddies Ajax, Smith, Goldie, and Frankie. I grew up with these jackasses. We are the next generation leaders of Hell’s Phoenix Motorcycle club. As a kid growing up on the street that harbored these members, I couldn’t wait to get my own two wheels. It was what I saved up for when I was working on chores and when I finally landed a job.

  Next door, the man that is like a father figure to me, Ralphie, took me under his wing when my father up and left my mother and me. Soon after, my mother went on a downward spiral of drugs and alcohol. It was hard growing up taking care of my mother who would come home slurring her words or being stoned off her ass. I can’t even begin to describe all the men that were in and out of her life. Many members of the MC took advantage of my mother. I hated it. But she allowed it. Numerous times, I would crash at Ralphie’s house because I despised being home.

  His son, Goldie, became a brother to me. He is a crazy mother fucker. We were tight in high school but after we both joined the service, we drifted apart. We are still good friends though, just not like we were. It probably has something to do with the fact that his father is hoping to pass the reigns on to me for president of our club. Goldie is a little unstable at times. War can really screw with a person.

  Frankie and Smith, brothers whose father was the Sergeant of Arms for the club, lived across the street from me. Like I said, our block consisted of members of the Hell’s Phoenix MC. These two are ridiculously smart. Smith is a civil engineer and Frankie is a chemistry professor at the university nearby. Sometimes, I wonder why they continued to hang out with us street boys after their service and college days.

  Lastly, there is Ajax. If I had a best friend, this would be him. Both of us were army boys. Served at the same time but different units. Ajax could have been a ranger but decided that helping his father run the club bar was more important. He doesn’t talk about his days in the service much. Since he was a weapons expert, he was on the front lines in Iraq. Out of the brothers, he is the hardest to crack. Ajax is as loyal as they get, though. He would give you the shirt off his back, if you needed it. His parents own Dirty Jays, a biker bar on the east side of town. He is the only one out of the group whose father didn’t join the club. Yet, he was involved in every club relation. He just didn’t want the cut. Ajax, on the other hand, could not wait to join.

  Once the last mourner exits, I change from business attire to jeans, t-shirt, and my cut. I lock up the funeral home and ride my bike to the bar. When I show up, the bar is already packed with bikers from several different clubs. Hell’s Phoenix MC is the peace makers between all the biker clubs in Omaha. We are here to serve our community and protect those who protect this country. With that, when other bikers come into Dirty Jays, there is an agreement to keep biker related activities outside of this bar. All the other clubs want to be here, the hottest pieces of ass come here. From old-lady wannabes to biker bitches. Dallas would kill me if she heard I referred to some of her friends as biker bitches, but it is better than calling them club skanks.

  Dallas is Ajax’s older sister. She is a spit-fire with blonde hair, huge tits who’s built like a Barbie doll. She and I have had our share of fuck times together. There are no feelings there at all. Yeah, I had the biggest crush on her in high school but most guys who grew up on our street, or any street, wanted Dallas.

  I walk into Dirty Jays and see the boys sitting at the bar. Dallas is behind it making drinks and smiling like she always does. She glances at me and winks. I nod my head in response. I pull up a stool next to Ajax and ask, “What’s up?”

  Dallas hands me a beer.

  Ajax answers, “Nothing much, man. Same old shit, different day.”

  I turn around and lean back to face the open bar. “Any new tail in this place tonight?”

  He laughs, “You serious? You haven’t been here five minutes and you are looking for ass.”

  “You know I got to keep up with the whole bad boy biker image. Chicks dig it.”

  He turns around on his bar stool to skim the crowd. He nods his head in the direction of some women sitting at a table. “They’re new. But I have seen the Devil’s Reject MC crew hanging by them.”

  I take a sip of my beer. “I have a chance, then?”
/>   “You always have a chance. Which one do you have your eyes on?”

  “Not looking to share tonight?”

  “Nope. I feel like breaking in new pussy.”

  A soft yet rough female voice comments behind us, “Are you fucking kidding me?”

  We both turn around. Dallas has her hands on her hips, giving us a snarky look.

  Ajax answers, “What?”

  Dallas rolls her eyes. “You two are fucking pigs. I heard your entire conversation.”

  I laugh, “You know we are gentlemen. We wouldn’t hurt those girls…too bad.”

  “Breaking in new pussy is absolutely horrible. Ajax, how the hell would you feel if some asshole said that about me.”

  Ajax stares at his sister and says, “I would kill a fucker for saying that about you.”

  “Exactly. I don’t care how whorish they look, you cannot treat women as if they are objects. This explains why you are still single. Maybe you are just a dick to them.”

  Ajax continues to glare, but smirking, says, “I’m totally fine just being a dick to one of them. As long as I get to fuck her brains out.”

  I continue to drink my beer, watching them argue this one out.

  “Avery, you’re a pig,” Dallas says, getting the last word in before she walks away.

  I grin at Ajax, “It’s quite humorous that she is calling you a pig.”

  “Why is that?”

  “Her friends and she are exactly like us when they are looking for some ass.”

  “You know I don’t want to hear that.”

  “It’s true, though.”

  “Yeah.” Ajax turns his stool to face the group of women we were eyeing. “Since I know how much you like brunettes, I will take one for the team and fuck the curvy blonde.”

  I turn around to face them too. “Sounds like a plan.”

  Chapter 2

  Hayden

  I close the door behind me, hoping not to wake my mother or Charlie. Night shifts at the hospital can be hard but it is what I need to do to provide for my son. When I found out I was pregnant after my one night with the mysterious biker, my life changed forever. I couldn’t believe it when I found out I was pregnant. I showed up numerous times to the bar we met at, hoping to see him. But no such luck. It was as if he disappeared from my life. From then on, I stopped looking and came to terms with being a single mom. My mother was my savior through all of this. Granted, she drives me absolutely insane at times, but she has the softest heart. She didn’t want me to raise Charlie by myself. My mother moved in with me. This is how it has been for the last four years.

  Charlie is my pride and joy. My father’s name was Charles. When I found out I was having a boy, there was no doubt in my mind he would be named after my father. To honor the sperm donor that Charlie will never meet, his middle name is James. Charlie looks so much like his father. Every time I look into those big, dark brown eyes, I see the man who turned my whole life around. The one night I decided to fuck a complete stranger, I got left with the biggest surprise of my life.

  Despite being completely attracted to the bad boy image of a biker, I said I would never date or even be tempted by one. Well, God has a great sense of humor, for sure. I got knocked up by one. My mother likes to constantly remind me that being a biker’s old lady is in our genes. I try to ignore that as much as I can, but she likes to point out Charlie to me. So typical of my mother.

  I walk into the kitchen to have some breakfast and make some coffee before I get Charlie up for preschool. I open the refrigerator to pull out some eggs when the floor creaks. I look to see my mother standing in the entryway of the kitchen. She grins, “Good morning, sunshine.”

  I respond, “Hey, mom.”

  “Coffee is actually made if you want some.”

  “God, yes. Thank you,” I pause and ask, “Why are you up so early?”

  “I got a call from Ralphie this morning.” Ralphie is my mother’s new boyfriend that she is so in love with. Well, that is what she says.

  With a snide tone, I ask, “Was he still up from the night before?”

  She shakes her head at me. “You don’t know him to pass judgment like that.”

  “Mom, I think we all know what bikers like him want at all hours of the night.”

  “Well, darling, you are completely wrong. He needs some help at the shop this morning.”

  “Mom, you don’t know how to fix bikes.”

  “His daughter, Grace, has a sick little one and he asked if I could cover the front desk. I told him I would until Charlie got out of school.”

  “Okay, he needs help. It is nice of you to help him.”

  She hands me a cup of coffee. “Your attitude is on point today. Rough night at work?”

  I take a sip of the freshly brewed, warm coffee. “Sorry, mom. Yes, I had a rough night. I had a young patient try to die on me. Not once but twice.”

  “I’m sorry, honey. Drink up, go to bed and I will take Charlie to preschool. You know I will get him from school.”

  “Thanks, mom. I really appreciate it. Sorry to be a bitch this morning.”

  “Honey, it’s okay. I do have one question. Since I will be helping Ralphie out at the shop, do you care if I take Charlie with me after I get him from school?”

  Fuck me. The last thing I want is Charlie around Ralphie and his buddies.

  “Do you have to?”

  “Honey, he needs help today. Plus, you need your sleep. Charlie will be fine. I will make sure he doesn’t try to be a prospect for Ralphie’s vicious biker gang,” my mother ends in sarcasm.

  I smile, “I guess it would be okay. But I will come by and pick him up once I get up and ready.” I pause, “Remember, I don’t work tonight.”

  “Oh, I didn’t forget. I’ve made plans to go riding with Ralphie tonight.”

  “I figured as much.”

  “All right missy, you need to get to bed. I will have Charlie come say goodbye before we leave.”

  I finish my coffee and head to the bathroom to take a shower. The lovely smell of hospital exfoliates from my skin. I turn the water on to warm it up and undress myself. I look at myself in the mirror and see the tiredness under my eyes. Thirty-two years old and I look like I have aged five more years. Working long hours several days in a row is starting to take a toll on my body. Charlie is what keeps me going; giving him the life he deserves. Granted, that little boy would be grateful for anything I gave him, but I want to give him the world. It is the least I can do for robbing him of a relationship with a father who has no idea who he is. One day, Richard and I might get married and he will adopt Charlie. Well, that is what I am hoping for.

  I step into the bear claw tub and turn the shower knob, letting the hot water rain down on my body. Richard has been absolutely wonderful. I am lucky to have him in my life. He doesn’t mind that I work a ton of hours and most importantly, that I have a child. He just rolls with it. His only hiccup is that I still live with my mother. But he knows my reasons for that. Richard has agreed to help me with Charlie, but I am not there yet in our relationship. My mother is really the only person I trust with Charlie. But Richard tries to be the male figure in Charlie’s life. It is sweet. Like I said, one day, it will happen, but if Richard was going to ask me, today, to marry him, I would be hesitant. I have no reason why, but my gut is telling me to hold off.

  James

  Well, I definitely had too much to drink last night. The sun shines through the window of my club room bedroom at the bike shop. Ralphie owns a custom bike shop that our compound sits behind. My head feels as if a hammer is pounding directly on it. I have no clue why Ajax and I thought it was a great idea to get hammered. Our days were not shitty at all, but we got wasted. I look at the clock to see it is six in the morning. Then I hear some female moaning. I shift my head to see who the hell is lying next to me. It is the hot little brunette Ajax pointed out for me. Sadly, I have no clue what her name is. I nudge her to wake up and say, “You need to get up.”

 
; Her eyes flutter as she tries to wake. She curls close to me like we had some kind of moment last night. Clearly, she has no idea she was just a fuck last night. If I wanted something with her, I would have remembered her and not taken her to the club compound. I own the home I grew up in. Ajax and Smith live with me. None of us bring women back to the house unless she is going to be more than just a fuck. So far, very few have made it across that threshold. It also takes a great amount of effort to get that far. Dallas is the only girl I have fucked at my house. It is only because she is not considered a club fuck. And she is Ajax’s sister. I am also the only guy she has hooked up with from the club. That will never change. Certain girls have certain rules. The rule with Dallas is she was hands off, until she decided to change that. That girl is a firecracker. Her brother tells her to stay away and she comes running toward his best friend. I have always been attracted to her but never acted on it until I got back from the service. We were all partying out at my house one night. She waited until her brother passed out drunk and she got what she wanted. We fucked like rabbits for a while before we told Ajax. I hated sneaking around Ajax with his sister. I broke the code to stay away from Dallas. One day, I told him and yeah, I guess I deserved every fist to the face I got. Dallas was beyond pissed off at me for telling Ajax. But from that moment on, Ajax didn’t want to know if we hooked up again or not.

  So many girls have tried to get close to us boys but none of them have made the cut. There is the whole thing about what they really want. Multiple girls want to hook up with a biker because of the image we represent. A good portion of those girls agree to get passed around from member to member. We might be the good guy bikers but that doesn’t mean we don’t think with our dicks. A fuck is a fuck. One would say we are selective about who rides on the back of our bike. There is only one girl I have even contemplated having on the back of my bike by choice. It was Hayden. That pussy was magical. I love a feisty woman and she was exactly that. But there was something about her I couldn’t stop thinking about after she left me with morning wood.